Insults Redeemed – Brad Jersak
Jesus and Insults:
- “You have heard it said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder,…” But I tell you that … anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.”
(Jesus, Matthew 5:21-22)
“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites!…- Woe to you, blind guides!… Woe to you, fools!… You snakes! You brood of vipers!”
(Jesus, Matthew 23:15-17, 33)
I’ve long wondered about the apparent discrepancy between Jesus’ dire warnings against the use of insults—a sin worthy of judgment—and the way he employs insults against his opponents toward the end of his ministry. I’m also troubled about how quickly I can respond with a harsh word… but even more so when Christians co-opt Jesus’ example to justify their own condemning words.
What makes insults wrong?
One dictionary definition says that insulting others is “to speak with disrespect or scornful abuse.” So defined, on the most basic level, using insults misses the mark of “speaking the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15) and blessing our enemies (Matthew 5:43, Romans 12:14).Can apparent insults be “speaking the truth in love?”
I can imagine occasions where Christ saw it necessary to use pejoratives (words that express disapproval or disrespect) as strongly worded but useful warnings to penetrate the defenses of someone living behind a wall of denial. While we’re not meant to lower the shield of faith for the accusers’ fiery darts (Ephesians 6:16), “the wounds of a friend are precious” (Proverbs 27:6). For that reason, I try to only receive insults from those with a track record of love for me. Those whom I’ve come to trust to only use pejoratives (1) in playful banter (their love language) or (2) authentic concern for my well-being and restoration. The occasional splash of cold verbal water to my face by a mentor is occasionally necessary to wake me up.Can insults be used on someone we don’t know or love?
Where there is no genuine relationship of mutual love, I’m now convinced that insults consistently fail to bring about change and, in fact, can energize or harden one’s opponent. Even Jesus experienced this phenomenon, and it led to his crucifixion. But knowing that, why did he ‘go there’? Was it an ill-conceived loss of patience—a self-sabotaging catharsis?I don’t believe Jesus had lapses in judgment. I suspect, rather, that for Jesus, the real audience was not those he insulted, but rather, third-party witnesses (then and now) who he loves so much that his insults were meant to warn away and release the victims of spiritual abuse lest (or because) they fall prey to spiritual hypocrites, fools and vipers. So the words his opponents don’t have ears to hear are meant to be overheard by the vulnerable, freeing them from the allure of the super-spiritual or hyper-religious leaders who hold them hostage.
That said, I fully recognize that our heart motives are not pristine pure. We’re not Jesus. And I know that the use of insults is more prone to missteps and abuse than to proper use.
Praying for those We Want to Insult
One wise solution suggested to me decades ago was that before I speak in harsh tones or words to another—even for genuine correction—I should fast and pray for that hypocrite, that fool, that viper. I keep praying for them until I see my own hypocrisy, folly and fraud. Until the knee-jerk zeal of my reactivity is displaced by a reluctance to preside as judge. There’s an insidious pride involved in firing off insults, an egoism that must be overcome by humility that sees one’s own faults. The presumption of enthroning oneself on Jesus’ judgment seat may actually be worse than the sins we would judge.
If and when that condemning spirit is cleansed from our hearts—when we’re ready to let the perceived offense go—only then will the Lord sometimes insist that we step out with a physician’s diagnosis (rather than a judge’s verdict). And even then, with the caveat that we will still “be judged by the measure with which we judge” (Matthew 7:2). That’s not so much a threat as a social reality that Christ himself experienced. When has the righteousness of our cause ever exempted us from a reaction?
As we consider the use of insults, I suggest that rather than looking for excuses to use them, our first thought could be to pray. I often pray this line from Ephraim of Syria’s ancient “Lenten Prayer.” O Lord and King, grant me to see my own faults and not to judge my brother, for blessed are You unto the ages of ages. Amen.
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